Brother Authors,
As week 1 of the institute comes to an end, we will write for the benefit of others and ourselves. To do this, I ask you to reflect on an experience that you can use to teach the rest of us a lesson. I offer a broadside below that captures the first time I was placed at gunpoint at age 11 (4015 days after I was born) in the Ida B. Wells housing projects. This experience and others, mostly positive, shaped my decision to become a teacher. We are the change agents we need. Things will not change until... The broadside is below:
Until…
By
Alfred W. Tatum
July 1, 2009
10:18 pm
Four thousand and fifteen days from my first breath
Cornered by the brown brick fearing death
Invisible in broad daylight
The wide-opened eyes closed shut by dull beginnings
Could not see me/himself
Because of what he was (mis)taught
Confused
Distraught
Blood continues to drip
On the inner-city asphalt
Until…
Until…
Until…
Im tired, and ive felt this for awhile now, hold on
ReplyDeleteim sleepy but insomnia's so strong
im so gone, think about me
dont forget the only one
who looks at everyone and sees a little sun
just a little moon
im in pain, itll be night soon
im hoping i can sleep, without counting off sheep
bloom, my roses whither please come hither
i must speak before i start to wheep, my voice quivers
my body shivers, my pen rattles, ill write my only thoughts
before i enter this battle
but, who am i?
but a guy, with a scar in his eyes
seen too many things said, too many people who've died
inside, i cant hide, i cant run or dissapear
seeing something so far, at the same time near
wave at me, youve caught me, but wait, i must think
how can i pull my baby out, we going down in a sink
caught in a whirlpool
in and out, out and in, home then back to school, am i a fool?
do i just ignore whats obvious
or is there somethin more, to all of this nonsense
mom, since i have none, ill use my mouth as a gun
flip my tounge and fire bullets till i feel like ive won
a prize. look in her eyes, can i see the real her?
does she care that the real me. is dying to see
if we were ment to be together, i dont think we need eachother, but we like one another
maybe i should light up my covers, tell my brothers i wont be long, my will is strong
imma prove imma tough dude, and leave a trail to my home.
but am i just another boy, she can use as a toy?
soldier, i dont think so, im older on then inside then i seem though
im smart, witty and clever, and if i must i will severe
the fatal attraction, that faintly holds us together
For My Own Sake...
The Man On the Bunk Bed
ReplyDeleteBy: Brother Author # 5
Counting the seconds of the rest of my life
I was interrupted by my last sight
An ignorant black man fighting off the guards
But of no success they threw him in hard
The man grabbed the gate of that rusty shell
I smiled for now I have something to tell
“Boy we are of excellent race”
“But in here we look ourselves in the face”
I held my heart for I was nearly dead
As I lifted my head and hopped out my bunk bed
“We are of no victim, you and I”
“But we are somebodies until the day we die”
“80 years I rotted in this cage”
“But never once did my opinion change”
The man tried to sit me down
But I was determined to pass my crown
“I marched with Brother Martin with no regret”
“But here is something no one will ever get”
The guards outside looked at me mean and dirty
“What are you looking at you jive turkey”
“What you negroes don’t know is that even in jail”
“With Tshaka’s pride we can prevail”
Some guards came in and took me away
I was fighting back just to say
“As-Salam Alaikum my brother for today I die”
“But know this tomorrow a black angel will rise”
As I was taken away to my execution I knew what was expected
The very next day everyone watched as…
Barack Obama was Elected
Love Diamonds
ReplyDeleteGive me to the people
Put power in their hands
I am what I stand, for
Deploy the soldiers and men who can’t stand war
In flag ships, let’s send fifty, these mercenaries are stars
Stripe the ground with tanks till the surface is scarred
With red blood, would have been blue, but the color or hue
Seemed to change with the flood of oxygen, you
Have no chance of stopping them
It’s convenient to thank heaven, all hell
Most of these boys are 7, 11, or 12
Don’t know if he’ll grow older
The life of a cold soldier
For the General’s glory
We fight for minerals, in this cynical story
Can I…trust the pastor?
While he prays to God and in the mean time
I obey master?
I’ve seen crimes that would make prisons look like a play pen
Most of them are childish they just want to Play men.
I say then, go ahead, over here people die quick
You haven’t witnessed rage till you’ve seen your friends head on a stick.
I walked to him and fell to my knees feeling sick
And through crystal tears, crying
I looked to the sky and asked God
“Do you love diamonds…?”
99 problems but fighting’s not one.
ReplyDeleteBrother Author #11
I walked off the bus in anticipation
Forgetting everything I knew was education
As I walked off he looked at me in disgust
That’s when I knew everything was about to bust
But that’s when I stopped thinking about what he can do to me
Then I said forget it there is nothing between us but a ton space and opportunity
Next thing you know I’m throwing fists with the dude
People tried to hold me back but I was in a mood too rude
All of a sudden I caught one in the gut
He kicked over to the street and left thinking he kicked my butt
But I was far from done
Watch old dude he about to look dumb
I quickly got to my feet, ran and got him with a tackle
As he fell to the ground I thought I heard his ribs crackle
I gained plenty of power so he caught one in the jaw
So I continued as my fist became raw
People began to pull me off of him and said “That’s enough”
But I’m like “Forget him I’m finna show him who’s tough”
I broke loose of their grip
I ran and jumped into the air thinking
I’m about to hit him with my fist and I hope his face rips.
The fist landed on his face and boy did his face rip
I saw his lip bleeding as he held it in a grip
My older brother and his friend came over and they saw what I’ve done
My brother put me on his back and said “I hope you’re done with your fun”
I’m like “Man (ump) that chump man I ain’t (umpping) done with that mother (umpping)
Piece of (ump)! (Ump) him!!!
Autumn Message
ReplyDeleteLeaves float down wistfully unto me, eyes shuddering, I see blurs
They look like people I’ve known…
In the crisp grass I rest, is how it should be
A field of play abandoned by all, I hear the birds calls
They sound familiar like people I’ve known…
I can taste the fading light in the air as the sun goes in hiding
My body feels cooler by the second and while I inhale the color of the leaves
My own fades. I feel weightless as if this field of grass was a never ending cloud in the sky.
My thoughts are becoming hazy as the wind blows more of my friends before my eyes
They all speak to me as they pass; I have to tell them something
The trees that surround me in a tight ring lean over me, watching.
Oh wait, it’s my family surrounding me, they’ve come to help me stand.
I don’t have the strength.
I stroke the hair on my brother’s head
It’s grown a lot, I have to, I’ll tell him.
“Listen…if you believe…that…Caucasians are the reason you can’t excel…that they’re stopping you…then...you…are a Caucasian.”
Through strained breaths I state my final words, to no one, no one
But my friends and family and my little brother, with his black mask on.
That just happen to look like leaves, trees and a raccoon.
I hope he heard me…in the autumn breeze.
Brother Author
ReplyDelete#7
STOP!!!!!!
I can hear the flames
Burning the future of others
Gun violence
Gangs
All of this is killing our city
Stop the violence
Stop the flames
Stop everything
Brother Author #2
ReplyDelete7/2/09
Running Back
I pay my bus fare and others like me follow as they run to the back,
but they act as though they do not have any social training.
They curse and shout derogatory words at one another, laughing
but will be ready to fight if someone of another race were to say these words.
They are fitting the stereotype by being loud and obnoxious on this bus,
but will swear that other races are out to get us.
NO! It is not these races out to get us,
WE are just committing suicide to our own people.
WE are digging graves for our generations, future generations,
and making our past generations turn in theirs.
The future belongs to¬¬¬ those who prepare for it today,
but we are way behind in our preparation.
So we need to buckle down, study,
and turn on our lights.
Brother author 10
ReplyDeleteSTAYING TOGETHER
Black and whites have been fighting for years but when I Start to die they feel sadness and fear. Why does a lifeHave to be gone before whites and blacks canStop live a long when I look them they look sad and happy.There are all together which make them happy But when I die the sadness come back how long will last how strong it will hold. Love is the glue that’s Keeping them together if they have each other they Don’t have to live in fear just joy and cheer
Day of Death
ReplyDeleteBy brother author #9
I’m on my street hanging around
Then some clown come around
He showed a gun then I heard a bam
Man I really got slammed
I saw people scream and run
I saw my mother I saw she was crying
I thought I was almost done
I can’t believe I’m really dying
I see people coming around me
I can’t see them because I saw bright light coming to me
I scream Lord help me !! help me!!
I’m almost dead, can you see?
Then I flash my eyes then I see
That I was just having a bad dream
#4
ReplyDeleteHer End
This burning feeling inside
It left me without balance
Like poor old Ms. New Orleans
I look back now on our good memories together
I wonder has she ever cried
All she has endured is now gone
I wonder if only I had a set of wings
I would change everything
We all have flaws, but she did not deserve this
No one did
I have done this to myself
I should not have harmed anyone with my actions
I had too much pride to cry
Now, I looked back onto my actions and did not wonder.
I, I, I, no I should have stopped
My injury indeed was indeed new, now old.
Come here son, I’m ok
Don’t hide your face your love will be back and even better.
Maybe we can come back someday
Brother Author #1
ReplyDeleteDistraught Image…
Two teen boys walking though a park.
Nothing ever goes wrong, right?
Wrong…
Two other boys taunt my image.
Ego overpowers, I talk back.
I try to stay strong.
I can’t.
I feel as if I was a punk.
They leave my image distraught…
Will it return to default?
Cry of a Bad Man
ReplyDeleteI work in chains
But I didn't do it I have a brain
At least i think
I was high though that's not a lie
Now I'm in this place
Hot and sweaty can't even sleep at night
Now you know that mess isn't right
The sun shines too bright.
But you can't turn off the lights
I always wake in a fright
Guards walk around with their might
Then flash people with their lights
But they just pick on me because I got life
Please do me a favor and don't live this life
Don't mess up a life worth living
Don't let it pass as i have
Take my advice
Live or you too will pass
Slave Boy
ReplyDeleteBrother # 5
You've taken away my dignity so I look at the sky
For I refuse to look down to see two million blacks who have died
Where is the right you took from my father
We still have hope so why even bother
My fellow brothers this has got to stop
For we don't deserve to be picking crop
For the white man or the white man's son
Is this America Mr. Washington
They are controlling us by fear and sin
But I bet I won't see a white foot in the cabin I live in
Tshaka is dead, but his blood is alive
My fellow brothers if I am to die
I want sons and daughters to see
How wonderful life of a black person can be
I'd do all that right now but instead
It will have to wait for there is a gun held to my head
Embrace Literature
ReplyDeletewhy should i sink
cus im perfectly captured in ink
and any writer would think
that even through the process
of printing and cuttin losses
the cost is, much more then frantic yelling from bosses
which arises at any moment
as souls search for atonement
to print their mistakes on paper
and manufacture not own it
ghost reality a copy paste kinda guy
who snaps pictures of a bugle
that print photos with matching
lies
or the surprise that youll see in a dames eyes
for a sorta sparkling figure that captures the heroes cries
or shines gold, ill behold the 2nd coming of the lord
thats great, a checkmate, as i finish and publish boards
or tactical mind games
in paper or hardback frames
with brief records of pawns
who helped in making of fame
the way harry potter got her puts publications to shame
she'll read that weed for hours before it damage her brain
im cleanin up mental thefts
more auto then mos def
in flows for public ages
on library shelves
hes only about 11 or 12
ill write of a child soldier
who embraced human hell
ill tell the nasty have at me
cus im not takin scars
or mention the jurisdiction of gods son
titled Nas,
or raging balls of fire in the sky thought as stars
when the sun is the biggest one since drones
dont probe far
ill stage it, and through the ages
when our history shook
ill win, picked up a pen
and wrote my story in books
Thats CheckMate...
REFLECTION
ReplyDeleteWithin my father’s habitat in the room of life.
I heard the sharp rapture of shattering glass, so I sprinted to the bathroom.
The medicine cabinet door was outcast and everything was gone
Then I heard a phone ring with a weird ominous sound.
When I turned around, I could see his reflection in the mirrior.
Then my heart almost stopped while I was full of fear.
Then I was tossed against the wall with a hand of darkness around my throat, I could see my parallel self in the presence of a pure and shiny blade.
The four-legged boxer came to my aid.
The masked man was then chased out of the house and never seen again.